“God has not been trying an experiment on my faith or love in order to find out their quality. He knew it already. It was I who didn’t. In this trial He makes us occupy the dock, the witness box, and the bench all at once. He always knew that my temple was a house of cards. His only way of making me realize the fact was to knock it down.”

― C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed

What a powerful thought.

Regardless of where you stand on believing in God and whether or not God places trials in our lives to test us, life will test you at some point.

The older I get the more I wonder how many of my "temples" are really houses of cards.

We see others whose metaphorical card houses have been toppled and quickly jump to conclusions about what they may have done wrong, not noticing we are balancing precariously in a card house ourselves.

But where’s the positive spin, Jake?

First, showing empathy for the weaknesses and follies of others can help us from meeting that same fate.

Second, seeing our house of cards for what it is before it falls can save us a whole lot of heartache.

Take a look at what you are building your beliefs and habits from to make sure they are built on solid footing.

Make it a great day.

Jake ​

One of the great things about writing this email every day is that I am forced to try and articulate my thoughts on some of the difficult areas of life.

Whether it be the balance between risk and reward or the balance between contentment and aspiration, the topics discussed are not easily defined and most days I’m not sure I understand what I am trying to write about.

But enough about the trials and tribulations of writing daily attitude emails, how is this applicable to others?

Forcing yourself to wade into and have the difficult philosophical discussions of life is an important part of understanding yourself and the world around you.

Stepping and leaning into the harder conversations is a big part of breaking through into deeper and stronger relationships with those around you.

Breaking old and established lines of thought by forcing them through the ringer of logic and language will also serve to grow us both in intelligence and maturity.

Are you having the difficult conversations?

Are you getting to the point of understanding those around you on a deeper level? Do they feel the same about you?

I know it can be hard, frustrating and maybe even make things worse for a short time, but it is worth it in the long run. One of the biggest benefits of having written these emails for so long is that others in my life have gotten insight into my thought processes.

I’m not suggesting you send out an email every day (only a crazy person would think they have something to say that often), but maybe some conversations could be had that aren’t happening right now. Maybe a meaningful email to someone on your team explaining your point of view would help bring closure to an outstanding issue.

Make it a great day.

Jake

Maggie turns 14 today. I found this email I sent out a few years ago and it’s still true today.

Today is Maggie’s birthday! Hard to believe we have a 10 year old in the house. We have officially gotten a child into double digits.

I can just hear all of the applause right now.

The biggest lesson that Maggie has taught me so far….enthusiasm makes the difference.

For some reason, God blessed us with one of the most enthusiastic people I have ever met.

She just radiates it.

It comes across in the class room at school.

It shows up at church on Sunday.

It shows up at the dinner table.

What if we could add just a little bit of that to our attitudes?

What if at the next meeting your first response to every idea was “That sounds awesome!”?

What if the next plan your spouse shared with you was met with “Great idea, babe, can we start right now?”

What if working out tomorrow morning could be met with a smile and a “This is gonna be fun!”?

What if we could be a little more like Maggie?

To quote a typical Maggie response, “Gee, Dad that sounds like fun!”

Make it a great day.

Jake

https://youtu.be/2MZxf-lQD-o

“’Cause it all belongs to You”

The idea of stewardship and everything belonging to God has been a very freeing idea for me over the last few years.

The “stuff” of life is not for me to worry about. It all belongs to God.

In the end, I’m not taking any of it with me.

My job is to do the best I can with the little time I have.

What do you need to let go of?

What are you worried about that you aren’t going to be able to take with you?

What really matters if the stuff isn’t important?

Make it a great day.

Jake

I have come to believe that my capacity for joy in life is a function of my capacity to love imperfect people. And the most aggressive calisthenics of that capacity is practicing vulnerability at times of the most acute emotional risk. For example:

· Saying “I love you” with no expectation of reciprocity.

· Offering assistance at a time of crisis to those who have wronged me from a motive of guileless compassion.

· Expressing a desire to reconnect toward one who might see it as an opportunity to wound me.

· Fully admitting my errors in willing acceptance of others’ right to forever delay admitting theirs.

Joseph Grenny

I received the above as part of a regular email I receive from the Crucial Conversations people.

The level of maturity expressed above escapes me most days, but I sure would like to get there.

Each day is an opportunity to work on my capacity to love imperfect people.

Each day is an opportunity to experience real joy.

Make it a great day.

Jake

We first make our habits, and then our habits make us. – John Dryden

Our habits represent a large portion of our daily routines.

We spend a lot of time following our well established and comfortable routines.

Over time, this adds up.

Bad or good eating habits add up to good or bad health.

Bad or good exercise habits add up to good or bad health.

Bad or good money habits add up to good or bad financial health.

Bad or good relationships add up to good or bad relationships.

We reap what we sow.

I know….super obvious, right?

So, what do we do?

We carefully and purposefully sow in the directions of our goals and dreams.

And if you don’t know what that looks like?

Observe. Seek. Look. Explore.

Find and pay attention to good and bad examples.

Learn from others and history.

Make it a great day.

Jake

A week of neglect could cost you a year of repair. – Jim Rohn

Jim Rohn often talks about maintaining the important values in our lives. This short quote is an important reminder of what it could cost you.

A week of neglect of your marriage could cost you a year of repair.

A week of neglect of your integrity could cost you a year of repair.

A week of neglect of your attitude could cost you a year of repair.

The week equals one year part isn’t important. Five minutes of neglect could ruin a marriage.

This is why knowing your priorities and sticking to them is so important.

Imagine having a really nice car but a marriage that is falling apart.

Imagine being super fit but having no friends.

Imagine having millions of dollars but a poor attitude (not going to have any fun with that money).

Don’t neglect that which is most important to you.

Make it a great day.

Jake

I came across this old daily attitude email and it reminded me of one of my goals the last few weeks – laugh more – have more fun.

Men, women, and children who cannot live on gravity alone need something to satisfy their gayer, lighter moods and hours, and he who ministers to this want is, in my opinion, in a business established by the Creator of our nature. If he worthily fulfills his mission and amuses without corrupting, he need never feel that he has lived in vain. – P. T. Barnum

We watched “The Greatest Showman” yesterday and this quote reminded me of one of the recurring themes – making others laugh and feel good is a worthy pursuit.

It’s too easy to fall into the trap of constant worry and stress.

We put pressure on ourselves to be perfect or to get it all done.

We lose sight of ourselves by allowing the unimportant and trivial of life dominate our thoughts.

We can let go of all that.

We can laugh.

We can play.

We can enjoy our work.

We don’t have to choose busy, worried and stressed life everyone else.

We can choose peace, joy and love instead.

Make it a great day.

Jake

https://youtu.be/ffej15-Dgl0

Two good reminders here.

First – smile. A lot.

Smile all day long.

Smile so much people think you are weird.

Second – tell the people around you that make you smile that you are thankful for them.

We all have someone that makes us smile.

Say thank you.

Make it a great day.

Jake

I believe that the greatest gift you can give your family and the world is a healthy you. – Joyce Meyer

Giving ourselves through service is one of our highest callings in life.

In order to give and give freely, we must be full.

Full of love.

Full of life.

Full of energy.

We fill ourselves by putting in good stuff.

We read good books.

We exercise.

We eat good food.

We receive love from friends and family.

We should fill ourselves up in order to pour ourselves out.

That’s why all the hard work and discipline is worth it. Because there is more to pour out.

We have less to give when we spend all we make, eat too much, don’t have any energy, and spend all of our free time entertaining ourselves.

What do you have to give?

Do you want to give more?

Got any ideas on what you could do to fill yourself up more in order to pour out more?

Make it a great day.

Jake