Teach self-denial and make its practice pleasure, and you can create for the world a destiny more sublime that ever issued from the brain of the wildest dreamer. – Sir Walter Scott

Make its practice pleasure.

To me, this is why attitude is important.

Our attitude or philosophy about something often determines our enthusiasm level.

I often think of ice cream vs exercise (I do this because I’m not a huge ice cream fan so it is easier on me).

Our attitude towards the two can make a big difference.

If we can choose to embrace exercise as a pleasure and relegate ice cream to something less, we’d probably make some better health choices.

To paint the picture of how that might go, think about a few scenarios….

Had a rough day…..a little exercise will perk me right up.

Had a great day….let’s top this off with a run.

Out of energy….man, I need to get my blood pumping – better get moving.

Time to celebrate…..let’s get out and go for a run together.

To be sure, if you said these things out loud most people would think you are a little strange. You wouldn’t be normal.

But that is the rub, do you really want to be normal?

If this analogy (ice cream vs exercise) isn’t useful for you, try to think of another one. Shopping vs reading. Watching TV vs praying. Stressing vs planning. I’m sure there are tons of good examples where an attitude or perspective change might do you some good.

Talk about it with someone. Write it down somewhere where you can see it. Practice some self talk to reprogram your mind.

Make it a great day.

Jake

It’s the world, dear. Did you expect it to be small? – Mrs. Beaver from The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe

This is one of my favorite lines from the movie.

One of the main characters, Peter, had just been complaining about how far they still had to go on their journey.

Mrs. Beaver’s quote is a great reminder – changing the world isn’t easy. It’s not small.

As you seek out purpose and the place where you can be of greatest value, don’t expect it to be small.

There is greatness within you.

You were built to change the world.

It’s going to be tough, but you got this.

Make it a great day.

Jake

https://youtu.be/v8P_go_vj00

I like the idea of “be the change you want to see in the world”.

And the idea of “do for one what you wish you could do for all.”

Want people to be nicer? Be nice!

Want people to complain less on social media? Post something positive!

Want your family to quit being so weird? Love on them anyway!

Our lives are full of moment by moment choices. We can choose to move towards where we’d like go or away from it. No sitting on the fence allowed!

Make it a great day.

Jake

The more sand that has escaped that has escaped from the hourglass of life, the clearer we should see through it. – Jean Paul

Obvious, right?

Including the word “should” at the end of this really hits the nail on the head.

Are there people that get older but not wiser? Yes!

Are there people who don’t learn along the way? Yes!

Are there people who mature and get wiser? Yes!

The should part makes a difference. Age does not equal wisdom. Experience does not equal skill.

Practiced experience creates skill.

A life thoughtfully and reflectively examined can lead to wisdom.

Are you examining your life’s experiences? Are you carefully and consistently building skills and experience towards something useful?

Make it a great day.

Jake

“God has not been trying an experiment on my faith or love in order to find out their quality. He knew it already. It was I who didn’t. In this trial He makes us occupy the dock, the witness box, and the bench all at once. He always knew that my temple was a house of cards. His only way of making me realize the fact was to knock it down.”

― C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed

What a powerful thought.

Regardless of where you stand on believing in God and whether or not God places trials in our lives to test us, life will test you at some point.

The older I get the more I wonder how many of my "temples" are really houses of cards.

We see others whose metaphorical card houses have been toppled and quickly jump to conclusions about what they may have done wrong, not noticing we are balancing precariously in a card house ourselves.

But where’s the positive spin, Jake?

First, showing empathy for the weaknesses and follies of others can help us from meeting that same fate.

Second, seeing our house of cards for what it is before it falls can save us a whole lot of heartache.

Take a look at what you are building your beliefs and habits from to make sure they are built on solid footing.

Make it a great day.

Jake ​

One of the great things about writing this email every day is that I am forced to try and articulate my thoughts on some of the difficult areas of life.

Whether it be the balance between risk and reward or the balance between contentment and aspiration, the topics discussed are not easily defined and most days I’m not sure I understand what I am trying to write about.

But enough about the trials and tribulations of writing daily attitude emails, how is this applicable to others?

Forcing yourself to wade into and have the difficult philosophical discussions of life is an important part of understanding yourself and the world around you.

Stepping and leaning into the harder conversations is a big part of breaking through into deeper and stronger relationships with those around you.

Breaking old and established lines of thought by forcing them through the ringer of logic and language will also serve to grow us both in intelligence and maturity.

Are you having the difficult conversations?

Are you getting to the point of understanding those around you on a deeper level? Do they feel the same about you?

I know it can be hard, frustrating and maybe even make things worse for a short time, but it is worth it in the long run. One of the biggest benefits of having written these emails for so long is that others in my life have gotten insight into my thought processes.

I’m not suggesting you send out an email every day (only a crazy person would think they have something to say that often), but maybe some conversations could be had that aren’t happening right now. Maybe a meaningful email to someone on your team explaining your point of view would help bring closure to an outstanding issue.

Make it a great day.

Jake

Maggie turns 14 today. I found this email I sent out a few years ago and it’s still true today.

Today is Maggie’s birthday! Hard to believe we have a 10 year old in the house. We have officially gotten a child into double digits.

I can just hear all of the applause right now.

The biggest lesson that Maggie has taught me so far….enthusiasm makes the difference.

For some reason, God blessed us with one of the most enthusiastic people I have ever met.

She just radiates it.

It comes across in the class room at school.

It shows up at church on Sunday.

It shows up at the dinner table.

What if we could add just a little bit of that to our attitudes?

What if at the next meeting your first response to every idea was “That sounds awesome!”?

What if the next plan your spouse shared with you was met with “Great idea, babe, can we start right now?”

What if working out tomorrow morning could be met with a smile and a “This is gonna be fun!”?

What if we could be a little more like Maggie?

To quote a typical Maggie response, “Gee, Dad that sounds like fun!”

Make it a great day.

Jake

https://youtu.be/2MZxf-lQD-o

“’Cause it all belongs to You”

The idea of stewardship and everything belonging to God has been a very freeing idea for me over the last few years.

The “stuff” of life is not for me to worry about. It all belongs to God.

In the end, I’m not taking any of it with me.

My job is to do the best I can with the little time I have.

What do you need to let go of?

What are you worried about that you aren’t going to be able to take with you?

What really matters if the stuff isn’t important?

Make it a great day.

Jake

I have come to believe that my capacity for joy in life is a function of my capacity to love imperfect people. And the most aggressive calisthenics of that capacity is practicing vulnerability at times of the most acute emotional risk. For example:

· Saying “I love you” with no expectation of reciprocity.

· Offering assistance at a time of crisis to those who have wronged me from a motive of guileless compassion.

· Expressing a desire to reconnect toward one who might see it as an opportunity to wound me.

· Fully admitting my errors in willing acceptance of others’ right to forever delay admitting theirs.

Joseph Grenny

I received the above as part of a regular email I receive from the Crucial Conversations people.

The level of maturity expressed above escapes me most days, but I sure would like to get there.

Each day is an opportunity to work on my capacity to love imperfect people.

Each day is an opportunity to experience real joy.

Make it a great day.

Jake

We first make our habits, and then our habits make us. – John Dryden

Our habits represent a large portion of our daily routines.

We spend a lot of time following our well established and comfortable routines.

Over time, this adds up.

Bad or good eating habits add up to good or bad health.

Bad or good exercise habits add up to good or bad health.

Bad or good money habits add up to good or bad financial health.

Bad or good relationships add up to good or bad relationships.

We reap what we sow.

I know….super obvious, right?

So, what do we do?

We carefully and purposefully sow in the directions of our goals and dreams.

And if you don’t know what that looks like?

Observe. Seek. Look. Explore.

Find and pay attention to good and bad examples.

Learn from others and history.

Make it a great day.

Jake